Adjourning!

       “The adjourning stage is when the team is completing the current project. They will be joining other teams and moving on to other work in the near future. For a high performing team, the end of a project brings on feelings of sadness as the team members have effectively become as one and now are going their separate ways” (Abudi, 2010). I would say teams that are high-performing and have established norms are the most difficult to leave. I believe this may happen because you a have built relationships amongst team members to obtain goals that have been set. The bond created becomes strong as the group moves from the different stages of team building. At the end, when the goal or project has been accomplished a relationship has been built with lasting memories for what has been accomplish by the team.

     One group I can recall being hard to leave was when I was Moral Dance Coach for Dance Marathon when I was a student at Texas Woman’s University. Dance Marathon committee was made of a team of up to ten students that put together a fun filled, theme packed 14 hour event to raise money for Children’s Miracle Network to help support local hospitals in Dallas- Fort Worth area. We would start with our own simple ideas once each person had their position on the team. Then we moved to storming, figuring out how we would want ‘dancers’ to be able to push through the event. We would come up with a theme for the night, decorations, music, group dance, games all to motivate our ‘dancers’ to stay on their feet for the event. Also fund raiser events to help raise additional money. Once the event happened we could see how effective our team had been at planning and now executing our event. Adjourning was fun, but yet sad because we had worked for months on this event and now we would be moving forth with our lives. We would still see each other on campus and still engage in conversations. A closing ritual we did was have a meeting to discuss how much money was raised and discusses the strengths and weaknesses of the night. Also discuss what could we add to improve the event and encourage more ‘dancers.’

                As I adjourn from colleagues during my Master’s coursework, I am sure I will have the same feelings. It will surely be a bittersweet moment. I will be happy to have accomplished my goal to obtain a Master’s. On the other hand, I will miss the connections and discussions I have had with colleagues during the course of my studies. As I move forward, I will have a sense of longing to still be a part of this college community of learners.

References:

Abudi, G. (2010). The five stages of team development: A case study. Retrieved from http://www.projectsmart.co.uk/the-five-stages-of-team-development-a-case-study.html

                

This takes the CAKE!

A recent conflict I dealt with was between someone in my personal life. We were figuring out things for my son’s third birthday party. The big deal was who would drive the birthday cake over to the venue. The cake was one of those two layer cakes made with fondue, jungle themed. Now I asked this person to drop me off with my mom, and they could take the cake and pick up balloons and I would meet them at the venue. Well, apparently this caused a disagreement that I COULD NOT comprehend at the time. The other person was very reluctant to take the cake and I couldn’t understand why it was such a big deal. Needless to say, we ended up going in the same car and we BOTH transported the cake and balloons. I think a strategy that could have helped us would be actually explaining why we either did or did not want to transport the cake. I think even showing empathy would have supported our conflict in a positive manner, as NVC suggest. The bottom line was that the other person just did not feel comfortable transporting the cake because anything could have happened during the car ride and that person would have felt responsible for any damage done to the cake. Had I shown more empathy and even asked” Why do you feel so opposed to taking the cake?” we could have resolved the issue sooner and more positively. Colleagues feel free to add any additional advice.

Who am I as a Communicator?

Doing this week’s assessments on communication anxiety, verbal aggressiveness, and listening styles was very reflective way for me to see how I communicate. Also it allowed me to see how other’s perceive my communication skills. Similarities I found for my personal evaluation and from other’s are that I prefer one-to one communication situations. Also I will do small groups, but have a strong dislike to speak in public.  Another similarity I found is that I often get tense when asked to speak publicly or with individuals whom I don’t know very well. Also I found that I had a Group 1 listening style as a similarity. Unfortunately, I couldn't get the details for this to pull up, but I know that I prefer to listen vs talk. Also I am empathetic and am often concerned with how the other person feels. I also never show impatience or a press for time. Differences I found is that in my more personal relationships I am more verbally aggressive. I tend to voice more of what I feel. I think this shocked me the most. I never really noticed how verbally aggressive I was with family members; I thought I was the same in any communication situation. I think I learned that I need to find ways to be positively verbally aggressive in my personal relationships to show more empathy towards close love ones without being defensive.

Communicating with different cultures

Sometimes I do find myself communicating differently with people in different groups and cultures. Some ways I communicate differently is that verbally I use more simple words and shorter sentences. I do this because I feel that the person may not be able to comprehend if I start becoming too complex with my words and dialogue. Non-verbally, I tend to look away often and sometimes posture start becoming more slump. My listening skills may tend to become in a passive state, showing a sense of mindlessness. I think this happens because it’s hard to understand them and more than often we need a translator. I feel that I am really NOT making a connection with the individual and this may be why I am not fully engaged and active in the communication situation.

Three strategies I can use to communicate effectively are to do the following:

1. Not exhibit cultural myopia. Understand that my culture is not superior to others, but to understand that we live in a diverse country.
2. Follow the ‘platinum rule’ and place myself in the other person’s shoes. Develop more empathy for those that are culturally different.
3. Practice actively listening and showing respect during communication situations.

Communicating via t.v.

This was a eye opening opportunity to reflect on communication amongst characters in a t.v. program. A show I chose was "Mountain Man" on the History channel. This is definitely a show that I would not watch. Watching the show with no sound or captions did make it complicated for me to understand what was going on. One thing I had to rely on was non verbal cues. I noticed when the men where in the mountains they were isolated by themselves and their was little communication. However, when they connected with family outside of work, their were smiles, hugs, and eye contact amongst family. When I watched with sound on I could better comprehend what was happening and grasp an understanding for the characters on the show. This was my 'aha' moment.

Joyce Meyers- A Competent Communicator

  When I think of a competent communicator I think about Joyce Meyers. She is an inspirational speaker that is well known across the world for giving her motivational and inspirational speeches, books, devotionals, etc. Behaviors she exhibits is great ethics. She has good moral beliefs and shows cultural responsiveness. She communicates in a positive manner and offers genuine advice and support to those who may be afflicted, hurt, broken hearted, stressed, lost, etc and offers God's word to provide peace. She is always posed and wears a smile that speaks life into the souls of others. With the behaviors she exhibits as a competent communicator, I would definitely model myself after her. I feel that it would allow me to be the caring and supportive person that people need to hear from. I would be able to enlighten myself and others that are around me.

Professional hopes and goals

My hope for children and families with diverse backgrounds is that people can learn to appreciate differences in other people. I hope we can learn that these differences are what make us all the unique individuals. We all are unique individuals and should gain knowledge about things we don't understand or don't know anything about. Using these approaches to differences can help build a positive outlook on diversity. It's like a fruit salad, meaning each individual has their own unique flavor or  fruit to put in the salad. Overall, its flavor is enhanced when different fruits are added to complete the salad, no one looses who they are but helps make the salad better.

My goal is that we as Early Childhood professionals continue to educate ourselves and others on the importance of equity and social justice. We have to advocate to others the importance of showing equity to any family despite their culture because our children should be our first priority.

To all my colleagues, thanks for your support on the blogs and discussion boards. Your personal comments, professional advice, and experiences have given me more insight to becoming a better advocate for young children and their families. Also keep up the good work and God bless you all in our journey to obtaining our Master's degree.